114

114 The One With the Candy Hearts
114 心型糖果

[Scene: Central Perk, Ross is eyeing a beautiful woman at the counter, and Joey and Chandler are egging him on to go talk to her. No pun intended. I mean it.]
[场景:Central Perk,Ross正盯着柜台旁一个漂亮女人看,而Joey和Chandler正在鼓励他用鸡蛋做借口去和那个女人讲话。这里并没有什么双关语,我真的是说鸡蛋]
//egg,有鸡蛋、卵子,还有怂恿的意思。至于这里该怎么理解,见仁见智吧。
Joey: I’m tellin’ you Ross, she wants you.
Joey:我跟你说啊,Ross,她需要你。
Ross: She barely knows me. We just live in the same building.
Ross:她几乎不认识我,我们只是住在同一栋大楼里而已。
Chandler: Any contact?
Chandler:有过接触吗?
Ross: She lent me an egg once.
Ross:她有一次借给我过一个鸡蛋。
Joey: You’re in!
Joey:这就没问题了!
Ross: Aw, right.
Ross:啊,好吧。
Woman: Hi, Ross.
女人:嗨,Ross。
Ross: Hey. (stutters something incoherent)
Ross:嘿。(结结巴巴语无连冠地说着)
Chandler: Come on, Ross, you gotta get back in the game here, ok? The Rachel thing’s not happening, your ex-wife is a lesbian—I don’t think we need a third…
Chandler:加油,Ross,你也该重回情场了,对吧?Rachel 那件事已经不再会发生了,你的前妻还是个同性恋,我想你不会还有第三个。。。
Joey: Excuse me, could we get an egg over here, still in the shell? Thanks.
Joey:打扰一下,能给我们这里拿个鸡蛋过来吗,带壳的?谢谢。
Ross: An egg?
Ross:鸡蛋?
Joey: Yeah, you’re gonna go up to her and say, "Here’s your egg back, I’m returning your egg."
Joey:没错,你可以过去对她说,“还给你一个鸡蛋,我把鸡蛋还给你了”。
Chandler: I think it’s winning.
Chandler:我想你能成功的。
Ross: I think it’s insane.
Ross:我觉得这有点神经。
Chandler: She’ll love it. Go with the egg, my friend.
Chandler:她会喜欢的。带着鸡蛋过去吧,我的朋友。
(Ross walks over to the woman, egg in hand.)
(Ross走向那个女人,手里拿着鸡蛋)
Joey: Think it’ll work?
Joey:你觉得这样可行?
Chandler: No, it’s suicide. The man’s got an egg.
Chandler:不,这简直是在自杀,那个男人拿着一个鸡蛋。
[Scene: Central Perk, Monica, Rachel, Phoebe, Joey, Chandler are there. Ross is still talking to the beautiful woman.]
[场景:Central Perk,Monica、Rachel、Phoebe、Joey和Chandler都在,Ross还在和之前的漂亮女人聊天]
Monica: You can not do this.
Monica:你不能这样做。
Rachel: Do what, do what?
Rachel:做什么?做什么?
Monica: Roger wants to take her out tomorrow night.
Monica:Roger明晚想跟她约会。
Rachel: No! Phoebes! Don’t you remember why you dumped the guy?
Rachel:不!Phoebe,你难道忘了上次是为什么甩掉这个男人的?
Phoebe: ‘Cause he was creepy, and mean, and a little frightening… alright, still, it’s nice to have a date on Valentine’s Day!
Phoebe:因为他很烦人,而且很小气,还有一点吓人…好吧,不过毕竟,情人节可以和人约会还是很不错的!
Monica: But Phoebe, you can go out with a creepy guy any night of the year. I know I do.
Monica:但是Phoebe,你在一年中的其他任何一晚都可以和一个讨厌的男人约会,我知道我会的。
Rachel: Well, what are you guys doing tomorrow night?
Rachel:嗯,你们男生明晚准备干嘛?
Joey: Actually, tomorrow night kinda depends on how tonight goes.
Joey:实际上,明晚的行动主要取决于今晚的结果。
Chandler: Oh, uh, listen, about tonight…
Chandler:哦,恩,听着,关于今晚…
Joey: No, no, no, don’t you dare bail on me. The only reason she’s goin’ out with me is because I said I could bring a friend for her friend.
Joey:不,不,不,你怎么敢抛弃我。她唯一答应和我约会的原因就是因为我说过我会给她朋友带一个我的朋友过来。
Chandler: Yes, I know, but her friend sounds like such a…
Chandler:是啊,我知道,但是她朋友听起来却有些…
Joey: Pathetic mess? I know, but—come on, man, she’s needy, she’s vulnerable. I’m thinkin’, cha-ching!

(Rachel throws a roll at Joey. He picks it up and eats it.) Thanks. Look, you have not been out with a woman since Janice. You’re doin’ this.
Joey:可悲?我知道,但是,拜托,老兄,她很需要,很脆弱。我在想啊,cha-ching!(Rachel向Joey扔了一个面包卷,他捡起来开始吃)谢谢。瞧啊,在Janice之后你就没有和女人约会过了,你也需要这样做。
Ross: Hi. She said yes.
Ross:嗨,她答应了。
Chandler: Yes! Way to go, man! (Chandler and Ross hug. Something crunches in Ross’ shirt pocket.) Still got the egg, huh?
Chandler:好啊!干得好,老兄!(Chandler和Ross拥抱,什么东西在Ross的口袋里碎了)鸡蛋还在身上呢哈?
[Scene: A Restaurant, Joey and Chandler are there, waiting for their dates to show up.]
[场景:饭馆,Joey和Chandler在场,等着他们女伴的到来]
Joey: (Looking at himself in the reflection on a knife) How do I look?
Joey:(看着餐刀反光中的自己)我看上去怎样?
Chandler: Oh, uh, I… don’t… care. (Joey’s date shows up) Ok, now, remember, no trading. You get the pretty one, I get the mess.
Chandler:哦,恩,我…不…在乎。(Joey的女伴出现了)好的,现在记住,不准交换。你分到漂亮的那个,我分到那个烂的。
Lorraine: Hi, Joey. Well well, look what you brought. Very nice.
Lorraine:嘿,Joey,不错啊,看你带来的什么。很不错。
Chandler: …And what did you bring?
Chandler:…那你又带来了什么?
Lorraine: She’s checking the coats. Joey, I’m gonna go wash the cab smell off my hands. Will you get me a white Zinfandel, and a glass of red for Janice.
Lorraine:她正在挂她的外套。Joey,我要去洗掉手上出租车的味道,你能不能给我点一杯White Zinfandel,再给Janice点一杯红酒?
Chandler: Janice?
Chandler:Janice?
(Lorraine leaves. Joey shakes his head as though to say, ‘It can’t be the same Janice.’ Janice enters.)
(Lorraine离开,Joey一边摇着头说“不可能是同一个Janice”,Janice进来了)
Janice: Oh…. my…. God.
Janice:哦…我的…天哪。
Chandler: (angrily) Hey, it’s Janice.
Chandler:(愤怒地)嘿,是Janice。
[Scene: The bathroom at the restaurant, Chandler and Joey are talking.]
[场景:饭馆的洗手间,Chandler和Joey在说话]
Chandler: Ok, I’m makin’ a break for it, I’m goin’ out the window.
Chandler:好吧,我要做个了断,我要破窗而出。
Joey: No, no, no, don’t! I’ve been waitin’ for like, forever to go out with Lorraine. Just calm down.
Joey:不,不,不,别这样!我等了差不多好像一辈子在等Lorraine这样的人,你冷静一下吧。
Chandler: Calm down? Calm down? You set me up with the woman that I’ve dumped twice in the last five months!
Chandler:冷静?冷静?你竟然给我安排了一个我在过去五个月甩掉过两次的女人!
Joey: (at the urinal) Can you stop yellin’? You’re makin’ me nervous, and I can’t go when I’m nervous.
Joey:(在小便池旁)你能不能不要喊叫了?你让我觉得紧张了,而我紧张的时候就出不来。
Chandler: I’m sorry, I’m sorry, you’re right. (gets up right behind Joey and yells in his ear) Come on, do it, do it, go, come on!!!
Chandler:对不起,对不起,你说得没错。(走到Joey身旁对着他的耳朵喊)快点,快尿,快尿,快点!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, the girls are all there, discussing their bad luck with men.]
[Monica和Rachel家,女孩们都在,讨论她们在男人方面的坏运气]
Rachel: Ok, ok, Roger was creepy, but he was nothing compared to Pete Carney.
Rachel:好吧,好吧,Roger很烦人,但是跟Pete Caeney比起来还是不错的。
Monica: Which one was Pete Carney?
Monica:Pete Caeney是哪个?
Rachel: Pete the Weeper? Remember that guy who used to cry every time we had sex. (imitating) "Was it good for you?"
Rachel:爱哭鬼Pete?还记得那个每次做爱之后都要哭的家伙吗?(模仿)
Monica: Yeah, well, I’ll take a little crying any day over Howard-the-"I-win"-guy. (imitating) "I win! I win!" I went out with the guy for two months—I didn’t get to win once.
Monica:记得啊,不错,不过和那个“我赢了”的家伙在一起的时候,我偶尔也要哭一下的,“我赢了!”、“我赢了”,我和那个家伙交往了两个月,我一次都没有赢。
//呵呵,以Monica的性格,她肯定是够不爽的。
Rachel: How did we end up with these jerks? We’re good people!
Rachel:为什么我们总是会遇到这类烂人呢?我们可是好人啊!
Monica: I don’t know. Maybe we’re some kinda magnets.
Monica:我不知道,也许咱们有特殊的吸引力吧。
Phoebe: I know I am. That’s why I can’t wear a digital watch.
Phoebe:我知道我有,所以我不能戴电子表。
Monica: There’s more beer, right?
Monica:啤酒还有剩下,对吧?
Phoebe: Oh! You know my friend Abby who shaves her head? She said that if you want to break the bad boyfriend cycle, you can do like a cleansing ritual.
Phoebe:哦!你们还记得我那个朋友Abby吧,就是那个剃光头的女人。她说过,如果你想要停止遇到坏男人的恶性循环,那么你可以做一个净化仪式。
Rachel: Pheebes, this woman is voluntarily bald.
Rachel:Pheebes,那个女人可是主动剃光头的。
Phoebe: Yeah. So, we can do it tomorrow night, you guys. It’s Valentine’s Day. It’s perfect.
Phoebe:是啊,所以咱们也可以在明天晚上举办这样的仪式,明天是情人节,正好。
Monica: Ok, well, what kind of ritual?
Monica:好吧,但是,是什么样的仪式啊?
Phoebe: Ok. We can, um, we can burn the stuff they gave us.
Phoebe:好吧,咱们也可以试试看。恩,咱们可以烧掉他们送给咱们的东西。
Rachel: Or?
Rachel:或者?
//看来东西已经拿去换掉,或者准备去换掉了。
Phoebe: Or…or we can chant and dance around naked, you know, with sticks.
Phoebe:或者…或者咱们也可以唱着圣歌裸体跳舞,还有,手里拿着权杖。
Monica: Burning’s good.
Monica:烧东西就不错。
Rachel: Burning’s good. Yeah, I got stuff to burn.
Rachel:烧东西不错,就是,我有可以烧掉的东西。
[Scene: The Restaurant, Joey, Lorraine, Chandler, and Janice are at the table. Joey and Lorraine are seated very close, Chandler and Janice have backed their chairs away from one another.]
[场景:饭馆,Joey、Lorraine、Chandler和Janice坐在桌子旁,Joey和Lorraine正在用亲密的姿势吃饭,Chandler和Janice靠着自己的椅子坐着,距离很远]
Lorraine: You know, ever since I was little, I’ve been able to pick up quarters with my toes.
Lorraine:跟你说啊,从我还很小的时候,我就能用脚趾头夹起硬币。
Joey: Good for you. (jumps suddenly) Uh, quarters or rolls of quarters?
Joey:厉害啊。(突然起身)恩,一个硬币还是一排硬币?
//一排硬币应该是指那种用纸包起来的一个圆柱体吧,按照Joey一贯的想法,再配合他的动作,很容易知道他想成什么了…18+,就不多说了(我也是翻译到这里才突然领悟到的,看来我的思想也不怎么纯洁啊)
Janice: By the way, Chandler. I cut you out of all my pictures. So if you want, I have a bag with just your heads.
Janice:对了,Chandler,我把你从我所有照片里都剪掉了,所以如果你想要的话,我那里有一袋子你的头。
Chandler: That’s OK.
Chandler:不用了。
Janice: Oh, are you sure? Really? Because you know, you could make little puppets out of them, and you could use them in your theate
r of cruelty.
Janice:哦,你确定吗?真的?因为啊,你可以用它们做成木偶,然后把它们用在你的残酷话剧中。
(Lorraine whispers into Joey’s ear.)
(Lorraine在Joey的耳边说悄悄话)
Joey: (to Lorraine) We can’t do that.
Joey:(对Lorraine)咱们不能那样做。
Chandler: (disgusted) What? What can’t you do?
Chandler:(厌恶地)什么?你不能做什么?
Joey: Uh, can I talk to you for a second, over there?
Joey:嗯,我能跟你说几句话吗,在那边?
(Chandler and Joey leave the table.)
(Chandler和Joey离开了桌子)
Joey: Uh, we might be leaving now.
Joey:嗯,我们可能要提前走了。
Chandler: Tell me it’s "you and me" we.
Chandler:告诉我是“你和我”这个我们。
Joey: She said she wants to slather my body with stuff and then lick it off. I’m not even sure what slathering is, but I definitely want to be a part of it.
Joey:她说她想要在我身体上涂满东西,然后全部舔干净。我不知道她想要涂什么东西,但我绝对希望被她这样做。
Chandler: Ok, you can not do this to me.
Chandler:好吧,但你不能这样对我。
Joey: You’re right, I’m sorry. You’re right.
Joey:你说的没错,对不起,你说的没错。
Lorraine: (to waiter) Uh, can we have three chocolate mousses to go please?
Lorraine:(对服务生)恩,能给我们三份巧克力慕思外带吗?
Joey: I’m outta here. Here’s my credit card. Dinner’s on me. I’m sorry, Chandler.
Joey:我要走了,给你我的信用卡,晚饭算我请。对不起,Chandler。
Chandler: I hope she throws up on you.
Chandler:我希望她吐在你身上。
(Joey leaves with Lorraine. Chandler sits back down with Janice.)
(Joey和Lorraine离开了,Chandler坐回椅子上,和Janice一起)
Chandler: So…
Chandler:那么…
Janice: Just us.
Janice:就剩咱俩了。
Chandler: Oh, what a crappy night!
Chandler:哦,多么一个无聊的夜晚啊!
Janice: Although, I have enjoyed the fact that, uh your shirt’s been stickin’ outta your zipper ever since you came back from the bathroom.
Janice:不过,我却挺欣赏一件事情,恩,自打你从洗手间回来之后,你的衬衫就一直从拉链里漏出来了。
Chandler: Excuse me. (gets up, jumps up and down while he zips his zipper up… other patrons look at him) How ya doin’?
Chandler:对不起。(起身,上下跳动着拉拉链,其他桌的人在看他)你们好吗?
Janice: So, do we have the best friends or what?
Janice:那么,咱们这算不算是最好的朋友还是怎样?
Chandler: Joey’s not a friend. He’s…a stupid man who left us his credit card. Another drink? Some dessert? A big screen TV?
Chandler:Joey才不算是朋友。他…这个笨蛋把他的信用卡留下了。想再喝点什么吗?来点甜点?大屏幕电视机?
Janice: I will go for that drink.
Janice:再喝一杯吧。
Chandler: You got it. Good woman! (the waiter turns around, it’s a man) Could we get a bottle of your most overpriced champagne?
Chandler:好的。妹子!(服务生转身过来,是个男的)能给我们来一瓶你们最贵的香槟吗?
Janice: Each.
Janice:每人一瓶。
Chandler: That’s right, each. Oh, and a uh Rob Roy. (to Janice) I’ve always wanted to know…
Chandler:没错,每人一瓶,哦,还有,一个,嗯,Rob Boy。(对Janice)我一直想试试…
//Rob Boy是一种酒的名字,不过不知道这里提到这种酒有什么好笑的地方
[Scene: Chandler’s bedroom, Chandler wakes up, and finds someone else’s hand on his chest. He rolls over and is shocked to see Janice there.]
[场景:Chandler的卧室,Chandler醒来了,发现别人的手放在他胸前。他翻过身,吃惊地看到Janice就躺在身边]
Janice: Happy Valentine’s Day!
Janice:情人节快乐!
[Scene: The Hallway, Chandler is trying to get Janice out of his apartment.]
[场景:走廊里,Chandler正在让Janice离开自己的卧室]
Janice: Oh, I miss you already. Can you believe this happened?
Janice:哦,我已经开始想你了。你能相信竟然发生这种事情吗?
Chandler: No… no! And yet it did. Good-bye, Janice.
Chandler:不能…不能!但是就是发生了。再见,Janice。
Janice: Kiss me!
Janice:亲我!
(Janice kisses him. Monica comes out for the newspaper.)
(Janice亲他,Monica出来拿报纸)
Monica: Oh, Chandler, sorry.
Monica:哦,Chandler,对不起。
(Janice turns around, Monica sees who it is.)
(Janice转身,Monica看到了她)
Monica: Ohhh, Chandler, sorry! Hey, Janice.
Monica:哦…Chandler,对不起!嘿,Janice。
Janice: Hi, Monica.
Janice:嘿,Monica。
Chandler: Ok, well, this was very special.
Chandler:好的,嗯,这真是很特殊。
Monica: Rach, come see who’s out here!
Monica:Rach,过来看看谁来了!
(Rachel comes out.)
(Rachel出来了)
Rachel: Oh my god. Janice, hi!
Rachel:哦我的天哪,Janice,嗨!
Chandler: Janice is gonna go away now.
Chandler:Janice正准备走呢。
Monica: I’ll be right back.
Monica:我马上就回来。
(Joey enters from the stairs.)
(Joey从楼梯上来了)
Rachel: Oh, Joey, look who it is.
Rachel:哦,Joey,看这是谁。
Joey: (in disbelief) Whoa.
Joey:(不敢相信地)哇。
Chandler: Oh, good, Joey’s home now.
Chandler:哦,这可好,Joey回来了。
Janice: This is so fun. This is like a reunion in the hall.
Janice:这太好玩了,简直就像是走廊里的重聚。
(Monica comes out with her cordless phone.)
(Monica拿着无绳电话出来了)
Monica: Oh, hi, Ross. Yeah. There’s someone I want you to say hi to. (to Chandler) He just happened to call.
Monica:哦,嗨,Ross。这里有个人想要跟你打招呼。(对Chandler)他正好打电话过来了。
Janice: Hi, Ross. Yes, it’s me. How did you know? (she laughs obnoxiously)
Janice:嗨,Ross。没错,是我。你怎么知道的?(开始进行招牌式的大笑)
[Scene: A Chinese Restaurant, Ross is there with his date.]
[场景:一家中国餐馆,Ross正和他的女伴在那里]
Ross: I’m just sayin’ if dogs do experience jet lag, then, because of the whole um, seven dog years to one human year thing, then, when a dog flies from New York to Los Angeles, he doesn’t just lose three hours, he loses like a week and a half.
Ross:我想说的是,狗在飞机上会感觉时间很长,因为大概,恩,狗的一年时间等于人类七年的时间,这样,如果一只狗坐飞机从纽约飞到洛杉矶,它花费的不是三个小时,而是一周半。
(Ross starts to laugh, and then makes a face like ‘Why did I just say that?’ Ross’ ex-wife, Carol, and her lesbian lover, Susan, enter the restaurant. Ross stares at them.)
(Ross开始笑,然后作出一副“我刚才干吗要说这个”的表情。这时候Ross的前妻Carol和她的同性恋爱人Susan进来了。Ross看到了她们)
Kristin: That’s funny. Who are they?
Kristin:真有趣。她们是谁?
Ross: The blond woman is my ex-wife, and the woman touching her is her… close, personal friend.
Ross:那个金发的是我前妻,正在摸她衣服的女人,恩,是她的好朋友。
Kristin: You mean they’re lovers.
Kristin:你是说她们是爱人。
Ross: If you wanna put a label on it.
Ross:如果你硬要这样说的话。
Kristin: Wow, uh, anything else I should know?
Kristin:哦,恩,还有什么事情是我不知道的吗?
Ross: Nope, nope, that’s it.
Ross:没了,没了,就
些。
(Carol takes off her jacket, her pregnant belly is exposed.)
(Carol脱掉了她的外套,露出了怀孕后挺起的肚子)
Ross: Oh, and she’s pregnant with my baby. I always forget that part. (to Carol and Susan) Helloo!
Ross:哦,她怀了我的孩子。我总是忘了这件事。(对Carol和Susan)你们好!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, the girls are holding their boyfriend bonfire.]
[场景:Monica和Rachel家,女生们正在举行火烧男朋友仪式]
Phoebe: Ok, so now we need, um sage branches and the sacramental wine.
Phoebe:好了,那么现在咱们需要,恩,sage的枝,还有圣酒。
//sage是一种草药,至于具体的作用就不用关心啦
Monica: All I have is, is oregano and a Fresca.
Monica:我这里只有牛至还有Fresca。
//牛至的介绍可以看这里:http://www.cahv.cn/news/html/2005-5/20055201555131.htm。Wiki百科上有更详细的介绍,可惜看不到,TNND。Fresca是什么就不知道了。
Phoebe: Um, that’s ok! (throws it in fire) Ok. All right. Now we need the semen of a righteous man.
Phoebe:嗯,也可以!(把那些东西扔到火里)好了,可以了。现在咱们需要一个正直男人的精液。
Rachel: Ok, Pheebs, you know what, if we had that, we wouldn’t be doing the ritual in the first place.
Rachel:嗯,Pheebs,你知道吗,如果我们有那东西,咱们一开始就不用举行这个仪式了。
Monica: Can we just start throwing things in?
Monica:可以直接开始扔东西进去了吗?
Phoebe: Ok, yeah, ok. (she throws the directions in) Oh, OK.
Phoebe:好吧,恩,可以了。(她把说明扔进去了)哦,好了。
Rachel: (tossing things in the fire) Ok, Barry’s letters. Adam Ritter’s boxer shorts.
Rachel:(往火里扔东西)好的,Barry的信,Adam Ritter的短裤。
Phoebe: Ok, and I have the, uh receipt for my dinner with Nokululu Oon Ah Ah.
Phoebe:好的,我这里有,恩,跟Nokululu Oon Ah Ah吃晚餐的收据。
//Phoebe都在跟什么样的人约会啊,竟然能起这样的名字
Monica: Look, here’s a picture of Scotty Jared naked.
Monica:看啊,这里有一张Scotty Jared的裸照。
Rachel: (looking at picture) Hey he’s wearing a sweater.
Rachel:(看照片)他不是穿着毛衣吗?
Monica: No.
Monica:没有。
Rachel and Phoebe: Eww!
Rachel和Phoebe:恶心!
Rachel: And here we have the last of Paulo’s grappa.
Rachel:这里还有Paulo剩下的格拉巴酒。
Monica: Hey, Rachel, isn’t that stuff almost pure…
Monica:嘿,Rachel,那不是几乎纯的…
(Rachel throws the alcohol in the fire. A burst of flames shoots up from it.)
(Rachel把酒精到进了火里,火焰马上窜了起来)
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler and Joey are there. Chandler is preparing to dump Janice again.]
[场景:Central Perk,Chandler和Joey在场,Chandler正在准备再次甩掉Janice]
Chandler: How can I dump this woman on Valentine’s day?
Chandler:我怎么能在情人节这天甩掉这个女人呢?
Joey: I don’t know. You dumped her on New Year’s.
Joey:我不知道,反正你上次是新年时候甩掉她的。
Chandler: Oh, man. In my next life, I’m coming back as a toilet brush.
Chandler:天哪。我下辈子一定会变成马桶刷。
(Janice enters.)
(Janice进来了)
Janice: Hello, funny Valentine.
Janice:你好,有趣的情人节。
Chandler: Hi, Just Janice.
Chandler:嗨,是Janice啊。
Janice: Hello, Joey, our little matchmaker. I could just kiss you all over, and I’m gonna!
Janice:你好,Joey,我们的小媒人。我真想亲你,我这就亲!
(Janice kisses Joey all over. Chandler smiles.)
(Janice亲了Joey一遍又一遍,Chandler笑了)
Joey: (to Chandler) If you don’t do it, I will.
Joey:(对Chandler)如果你不开口,我就说了。
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant.]
[场景:中国餐馆]
Ross: So, um, what do you do for a living?
Ross:那么,恩,你靠什么职业谋生呢?
Kristin: Well, um, for the past few years I’ve been working..(Ross is watching Carol and Susan, not listening to Kristin. Susan gets up, and has to go. Carol is left stranded)…which is funny because, that wasn’t even my major.
Kristin:嗯,过去几年里我一直在…(Ross正在看Carol和Susan,没有听Keistin讲话。Susan起身了,打算离开,Carol自己一个人留了下来)…有趣的是,这并不是我的专业。
Carol: Oh no. I thought you said they could shoot the spot without you.
Carol:哦,不,我以为你说他们可以自己去打鸽子了。
//Spot这里可能是指斑头鸽
Susan: I thought they could…I’ll try to get back as soon as I can. I’m sorry. (Ross realizes Kristin was expecting him to laugh, so he starts to laugh hysterically.)
Susan:我本来也这样想…我会尽快赶回来的,对不起。(Ross意识到Kristin正在期待他笑一下,所以他开始了不自然的笑)
Ross: Now that is funny. Hey, do you think…would it be too weird if I invited Carol over to join us? ‘Cause she’s, she’s alone now, and pregnant, and, and sad.
Ross:这可真是有趣。嘿,你觉得…如果我邀请Carol过来和咱们一起坐会不会显得有些太奇怪了?因为,因为她现在就一个人,而且还怀孕了,而且很伤心。
Kristin: (reluctantly) I guess.
Kristin:(不愿意地)我想是的。
//Keistin的意思应该是觉得挺奇怪的,但Ross明显理解错误
Ross: Are you sure? Great. Carol? Wanna come over and join us?
Ross:你确定吗?太好了。Carol,想过来和我们一起坐吗?
Carol: Oh, no no no. I’m fine. I’m fine.
Carol:哦,不,不,不,我很好,我很好。
Ross: Come on. These people’ll scooch down. You guys’ll scooch, won’t you? Let’s try scooching! Come on. Come on. Uh, Kristen Riggs, this is Carol Willick. Carol, Kristin. Uh, Carol teaches sixth grade. And, Kristin, Kristin…(struggling)…does something that, funnily enough, wasn’t even her major!
Ross:来吧。这些人可以挤一挤。你们几个可以挤一挤,对吧?大家尽量挤一挤把!快点,快点。恩,Kristin Riggs,这是Carol Willick。Carol,Kristin。恩,Carol教六年级。然后,Kristin,Kristin…(努力想)…的职业是,很有趣,不是她的专业!
[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, firemen are there to handle the bonfire that got out of control.]
[场景:Monica和Rachel家,消防员正在处理火烧男朋友仪式失控后造成的火灾]
Fireman No. 1: What do we got there?
一号消防员:里面都有什么?
Fireman No. 2: A piece of something: boxer shorts, greeting cards, and what looks like a half-charred picture—Wow, that guy’s hairier than the Chief!
二号消防员:一些东西的碎片:短裤、贺卡,还有烧剩一半的相片,哦,那个人的毛比队长还要茂盛!
Monica: You know, it’s a really funny story how this happened.
Monica:要我说,这件事发生的原因真是一件有趣的故事。
Fireman No. 3: It’s all right. It’s all right. You don’t have to explain. This isn’t the first boyfriend bonfire that we’ve seen get out of control.
三号消防员:没关系,没关系的。你们不用解释,这不是我们见过的火烧男朋友仪式失事后的火灾。
Fireman No. 1: You’re our third call tonight.
一号消防员:你们是我们今晚处理的第三起。
Rachel: Really?
Rachel:真的?
Fireman No. 2: Oh, sure, Valentine’s is our busiest night of the year.
二号消防员:哦,当然,情人节是我们一年里最忙的时候。
[Scene: Central Perk.]
[场景:Central Perk]
Janice: I brought you something.
Janice:我给你买了东西。
Chandler: Is it loaded? Oh, little candy hearts. (reading the candy) Chan and Jan Forever.
Chandler:上膛没有?哦,心型糖果。(读糖果上的字)Chan和Jan到永远。
Janice: I had them made special.
Janice:我让他们特制的。
Chandler: Ok, Janice. Janice. Hey, Janice. Look, there’s no way for me to tell you this. At least there’s no new way for me to tell you this. I just don’t things are gonna work out.
Chandler:好吧,Janice,Hanice。嘿,Janice,你瞧,我根本没法告诉你这件事,至少我没有什么新的方法告诉你这件事。我只是觉得咱俩不应该继续交往下去了。
Janice: That’s fine.
Janice:没关系。
Chandler: (surprised) It is?
Chandler:(吃惊地)真的?
Janice: Mmm-hmm. Because I know that this isn’t the end.
Janice:嗯,嗯,因为我知道这还不是结局。
Chandler: Oh no, you see, actually it is.
Chandler:哦,不,正如你看到的,实际上这就是。
Janice: No, it isn’t, because you won’t let that happen. Don’t you know it yet? You love me, Chandler Bing.
Janice:不,不是,因为你不会让这种事情发生的。你还不知道吗?你爱我,Chandler Bing。
Chandler: Oh, no I don’t.
Chandler:不,我不爱。
Janice: Well then ask yourself this. Why do you think we keep ending up together? New Year’s? Who invited who? Valentine’s? Who asked who into whose bed?
Janice:嗯,那你扪心自问,咱俩为啥总是能分而复合?新年的时候,谁找的谁?情人节呢,又是谁请谁上了谁的床?
Chandler: I did, but…
Chandler:是我,但是…
Janice: You seek me out. Something deep in your soul calls out to me like a foghorn. Janice, Janice. You want me. You need me. You can’t live without me. And you know it. You just don’t know you know it. See ya.
Janice:你追求我,有时候你的内心深处就像有一个声音在呼唤,Janice,Janice。你想要我,你需要我,你不能没有我。你知道这个,但你只是不知道你知道罢了。再见。
(She kisses him passionately,then leaves.)
(她动情地亲了他,然后离开了)
Chandler: Call me!
Chandler:给我打电话!
[Scene: The Chinese Restaurant, Ross and Carol are talking. Kristin is not there.]
[场景:中国餐馆,Ross和Carol在谈话,Kristin不在]
Carol: It’s not true. I never called your mother a wolverine.
Carol:这不是真的。我从没有叫过你妈狼獾。
Ross: You did so. I swear, I swear—(noticing Kristin’s absence) How long has she been in the bathroom?
Ross:你叫过。我发誓,我发誓,(注意到Kristin的缺席)她去洗手间多久了?
Carol: Uh, I don’t think she’s in the bathroom. Her coat is gone.
Carol:嗯,我想她不是去洗手间了,她的外套也不在了。
Ross: Well maybe it’s cold in there. Or maybe I screwed up the first date I had in 9 years.
Ross:嗯,也许那里很冷。或者,我把九年来的第一次约会给搞砸了。
Carol: That could be it.
Carol:可能吧。
Ross: Oh, god. (He puts his head down on the grill) You know, this is still pretty hot. (He picks his head up, and a mushroom sticks to his head. Carol picks it off and eats it.)
Ross:哦,天哪。(他把头放在了烤肉架上)你知道么,这里还是很烫的。(他抬起头,一块蘑菇粘在了他头上,Carol拿了下来然后吃掉了)
Carol: Mushroom. Smile. They won’t all be like this. Some women might even stay through dinner. Sorry, that’s not funny
Carol:蘑菇。笑。并不是所有约会都回像这样的,有些女人至少会留下直到吃完晚饭。对不起,这并不可笑。
Ross: No, it’s just…you know the whole "getting on with your life" thing. Well, do I have to? I mean, I’m sitting here with this cute woman, and, and, and she’s perfectly nice, and, but that there’s, that’s it. And um, and then I’m here talkin’ to you, and, and it’s easy, and it’s fun, and, and I don’t, I don’t have to…You know, here’s a wacky thought. Um, what’s say you and I give it another shot? No no no, I know what you’re gonna say, you’re a lesbian. But what do you say we just put that aside for now you know? Let’s just stick a pin in it, ok? Because, we’re great together, you know. You can’t deny it. Besides, you’re carrying my baby. I mean, how perfect is that? But see, you know, you keep sayin’ that, but there’s somethin’ right here. I love you.
Ross:不,这只是…你知道那套“继续你的生活”之类的鬼话,不过,我有必要这样做吗?我是说,我正和这位可爱的女人坐在一起,而且,而且,而且她相当漂亮,而且,但是,但是,恩,然后我就在和你聊天了,而且,而且这很容易,也很有趣,而且,我不,我不必,你知道的,我有一种古怪的想法。恩,你说咱俩再试一次怎么样?不,不,不,我知道你要说什么,你是同性恋,但是你怎么解释咱俩刚刚根本没有想到这件事情?咱俩就试试看如何?因为咱俩在一起真的很好,你知道吗,这你无法拒绝。而且,你还怀了我的孩子。我是说,这多好啊,但是你看,你知道的,你总是说,还有更适合我的。我爱你。
(They kiss.)
(他俩接吻)
Carol: Oh, I love you too. But…
Carol:哦,我也爱你,但是…
Ross: No but, no but.
Ross:不要但是,不要但是。
Carol: You know that thing you put over here with the pin in it? It’s time to take the pin out. You’ll find someone, I know you will. The right woman is just waiting for you.
Carol:你知道吗,你刚才说的试试看的事情,咱俩真的不能这样。你会遇到一个人的,我知道你会的。更好的女人正在等着你呢。
Ross: That’s easy for you to say, you found one already.
Ross:你说的倒轻巧,你已经找到好女人了。
Carol: All you need is a woman who likes men and you’ll be set.
Carol:而你需要的只是一个喜欢男人的女人,你肯定会遇到的。
(A beautiful woman walks by Ross, he stares at her.)
(一个漂亮女人从Ross身边走过,他盯着人家看)
Carol: Not her.
Carol:不是她。
[Scene: Monica and Rachel’s, The girls are talking with the firemen.]
[场景:Monica和Rachel家,女孩们正在和消防员聊天]
Fireman No. 3: We get off around midnight, why don’t we pick you up then?
三号消防员:我们午夜的时候就下班了,到时候过来接你们去玩吧?
Rachel: So, um, will you bring the truck?
Rachel:那么,恩,你们会开着消防车来吗?
Fireman No. 3: I’ll even let you ring the bell.
三号消防员:我可以让你们拉铃。
Rachel: Oh, my god.
Rachel:哦,我的天哪。
Phoebe: See, there you go, the cleansing works!
Phoebe:看,有用吧,清理仪式。
Monica: They’re nice guys.
Monica:他们真是好人。
Rachel: Oh, they’re firemen guys.
Rachel:哦,他们可是消防员啊。
[Scene: Out in the hall, the firemen are talking.]
[场景:走廊外面,消防员在说话]
Fireman No. 1: You guys tell them you were married?
一号消防员:你们几个会告诉他们你们已婚吗?
Fireman No. 2: No way!
二号消防员:当然不会!
Fireman No. 3: Are you kidding? My girlfriend doesn’t know, I’m not gonna tell them!
三号消防员:你在开玩笑吗?我女朋友都不知道,我怎么会告诉她们!
End
居终

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